Peace, Finding My Happy Place
There I was. Just getting in from class. I set my things down. I stood up. The whole world seemed to disappear as I focused on my unseen “List.” No one else was in the room. I started thinking about what I needed to do for the rest of the day. I had intended to simply go over each project, paper, assignment one by one, prioritizing each item according to their due date. No problem right? I had done this many times before. In fact, I had already written some things down, I just needed to take time to think. Here it goes! Number 1…. All of a sudden, it hits me, like a flood! Instead of just thinking of one thing at a time, everything came to me all at once. I felt my breath and my heart racing. Sweat began to form on my head. I was having an anxiety attack. As I felt my world turning upside down, I immediately turned my attention to Jesus. I began to pray and worship God out loud. It was all I knew to do in that moment. Everything began to calm down. My heart stopped racing, my breathing became longer, and the sweat went away. I dropped to my knees and acknowledged the Presence of God right there. Then I took a break before I got back to the work I needed to do.
How many of us have felt this before? We have goals/plans to accomplish much and in the perfect world we reach the top of our Mt. Everest, post our flag, and then go and enjoy a much needed recovery nap, or watch TV, or get on Social Media, or something that allows us to deflate. But all too often, we run here and there, and the world pays no attention to our perfect agenda. Sometimes it seems like nothing works the way that its supposed to. Sometimes the fear of this reality is paralyzing in itself. There is so much to do and so little time it seems. Our list can grow by multiplication with the help of addition. The Goals can range from Personal to Spiritual, Physical to Mental/Emotional Health, and even from Relational to Financial with so much more in between. We often start off strong with the best intentions and then reality stomps on our dreams.
Anxiety also comes when we are overwhelmed with responsibility. Whether to our family, friends, workplace, or even household chores, responsibility comes in many forms. Fulfilling responsibility, as the pressure is turned up, becomes a daunting task. Its like playing one-on-one basketball with Lebron James himself. Your responsibility is to make a shot. Its not impossible, but he will not make it easy. Many of us have anxiety from the fear of not rising to the challenge. We fill ourselves with negative thoughts and lies that keep us stuck in a place where we don’t want to be. It can hit us at our lowest points and in different ways.
It was dark and stormy. The waves were reaching over and into the boat. The lightning was flashing and the thunder sent shockwaves through the water and hearts of the men inside. Experienced fisherman, they, well at least 4 of them, had been through this before. As a group this was the second time with one crucial difference, Jesus wasn’t in the boat! Here they were, by themselves, being tossed around by the wind and waves, and Jesus was no where to be found. He had given them a plan. He had told them where to go. But know anxiety found them weary and not knowing what to do. For hours they fought, until around 3am, somebody saw something heading in their general direction. As they peered into the lightning-infested darkness, their anxiety only grew as they saw what they thought was a ghost.But just as the thunder ended its roar, a voice, a familiar voice rang through the noise of wind and waves and pierced their ears with a reassurance that grabbed their attention. It was none other than Jesus, walking on the water. “Don’t be afraid! Its Me!!” Jesus said. It would be nice if the storm stopped at that point, but it didn’t. Instead, the storm itself became the context for one of the most powerful examples of overcoming anxiety in the Bible. Peter, in the midst of the storm, takes a bold leap of faith, and steps out of the boat, onto the water, and begins walking to Jesus. It would be nice if the storm stopped here, but it doesn’t. Peter eventually sinks, and in doing so, reminds us of 3 of the most important words that form a sentence in the Bible, “Lord, SAVE ME!!!” And immediately, Jesus reached down and grabbed him, pulled him up, and brought him back to the boat. Then, the storm stopped.
This year, we are choosing to begin again. We are choosing to seek first the Kingdom of God and His Righteousness. Family, this is our Peace, our Happy Place. Peace doesn’t always mean feeling good. In fact, I’m pretty sure Peter did not feel peaceful or happy when he took his eyes off Jesus and sank in the midst of a raging storm. Peace is most often an acknowledgment or even a cry to God for help in the midst of our fear/anxiety. It culminates in the miracle of taking one step at a time keeping our eyes on Jesus in the midst of great turbulence. It allows us to sleep in the midst of the storms that threaten to capsize our boats and destroy our hopes and dreams, knowing that they won’t. It reminds us that yes, the pressure will turn up, the workouts will get more challenging, the projects will be due soon, the self-work will be uncomfortable, but if we make Jesus our Happy Place, our Peace, we will tell these mountains to move from here to there and they will move and nothing will be impossible for us. (Mark 11), We will be able to walk on the waters of our lives and use them as a runway to soar on wings as eagles. (Isaiah 40). As we put our trust in Him and hand over all things that concern our hearts to Him, we will find rest for souls and victory in our lives. (Matthew 6).
So when you start to feel overwhelmed with anxiety in any of its forms,, stop, drop, and pray. Take a break. Talk to The Lord. Then get back in the game. He has promised to give strength and wisdom while you move step by step. He has ordered your steps and will see you through. He will keep you in perfect peace if you keep your mindset stayed on Him because you trust Him (Isaiah 26). He is your Happy Place in the midst of every storm.
Chaplain Shaun M. Paschal